NRI in US plans return to India after 8 years abroad due to stress and toxic work culture

A 36-year-old Indian software engineer living in the United States has opened up about his worsening mental health, saying he is now considering resigning and returning to India after nearly eight years abroad.

Sharing his story on Reddit, the techie wrote, “Every morning when starting the day, I feel like I’ll end up having a stroke,” while describing the extreme pressure he has been facing at work.

The tech professional said he moved to the US in 2013 for his master’s degree, which took seven years to complete. After graduation, he secured a job at a top 50 tech company, where he has continued working. However, he said things changed drastically last year.

“Toxic management, extreme stress and pressure due to AI push, office politics,” he wrote, adding that the fear of layoffs and the changing nature of the tech industry have made everyday life mentally exhausting.

He also shared that he has been on high blood pressure medication and antidepressants since last year. “I’m already taking high BP medications and anti depressants since last year,” he said in the post.

According to him, the stress has become so severe that he often spends weekends sitting in movie theatres just to avoid being alone with his thoughts.

“Things have become so bad that I often end up going to movie theaters every weekend just so I cannot worry for a few hours,” he wrote.

‘I JUST DON’T HAVE THE STRENGTH TO BE ALONE ANYMORE’

Apart from work stress, the man also spoke about years of emotional isolation. He said he has mostly been by himself throughout life, having been raised by his mother and sent away early for schooling.

“I’ve always been by myself at this point, I just don’t have the strength to be alone anymore while constantly fighting the stress at work,” he wrote.

He added that he had started disliking the tech industry itself. Though hired as a software engineer and later promoted to Senior SWE, he said he was pushed mainly into frontend UI development, a role he now fears may be the first to be affected by AI-driven layoffs.

“I’ve also started disliking tech with each day now,” he wrote.

Even transferring to his company’s India division does not feel like a solution, he said, because the same toxic culture exists there too. He pointed to offshore teams working till 2 or 3 am and even on weekends just to meet management-imposed deadlines.

“I’m just DONE – I am no longer interested in the work or even in these crazy hours,” he wrote.

RETURN TO INDIA NOW FEELS LIKE THE ONLY OPTION

The engineer said his parents have been supportive and are encouraging him to return. His main concern is whether, at his age, he will still be able to find opportunities in India.

He also said he has been considering doing an MBA in India to shift into a different field or move into a tech-adjacent role. Financially, he believes he can manage for some time, adding that he is willing to take even a lower-paying job if it offers better work-life balance.

“I’m happy to take up any low-paying job too in India, with a better WLB,” he wrote.

His emotional post has resonated with many online, with users saying life abroad often looks successful from the outside, but many professionals silently struggle with burnout, loneliness and the hidden emotional cost of staying away from home.

For many, his story became a reminder that returning home is not always about failure – it can also be about choosing mental health, family support and a life that feels worth living.

(Disclaimer: This story is based on a social media post. The details, including figures, background, and outcomes, have not been independently verified by India Today. The article is intended for informational purposes only, and readers are advised to exercise their own discretion before drawing conclusions or making decisions based on the content.)

Written By: Vidhya Das

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